Sharkey
Word Ninja
A couple of my best friends and I have a post-Thanksgiving day tradition. We load up my Jeep with some things that go bang and head up into the mountains for an afternoon of shooting and hanging out. Today was the day, well, that was the plan anyway. Locals will know the trail as the Hunter Lake trail. It's not particularly difficult but there are some sections where it is one way up / one way down.
Well, we got about 3/4 of the way up one of those sections only to find bone stock Toyota resting its passenger front end on a very large boulder (boulder was wedged under the front bumper and against the A-arm and stub shaft). There was a frantic 20-something girl in the passenger seat, a passed-out cold piece of shit dude in driver's seat, broken glass all over the trail (driver's window that he had smashed out before passing out because he was too drunk to figure out how to open the door) and a 750 ml bottle of hennessey with only 1/4 left sitting on the ground.
Long story short, there was no way around them. I was able to yank the Yota off of the rock with some creative strap work. You can see the boulder next to the passenger door in the pic below. We disarmed (yes, he was literally in that condition and in possession of a firearm) the passed out fucktard and hid the keys.

The guy never woke up (yes, he was still alive, just passed out cold). I wasn't going to leave her up there, so she hopped in my Jeep and I drove her 40 minutes back down the hill, then came back up. By that time, the drunk fuck had woken up and was stumbling around in the trees, talking about how he got his friend's truck stuck. He had no clue that I had been there, didn't know the truck was no longer stuck, and didn't once ask where the girl was that had been with him.
He also didn't know that some POS driving a frankenfuck of a 60's vehicle mated to a truck frame with about 14" of leaf spring lift had tried to drive around him...straight over the top of deadfall, dried bushes, and trees. It was right about then that I yelled "fire". Frankenfuck's exhaust caught the brush on fire...not just a little fire, but the kind that destroyed the vehicle in about five minutes (melted tires and all). Fortunately, I guess, Frankenfuck and Mrs. Frankenfuck made it out safely and were on the phone calling the fire department.
So much more to the story but it's better told over a beer than in written form. Needless to say though, people fucking suck.
Fuck you to the guy in the Toyota for driving drunk, plugging the trail, putting someone else's life in danger... and pretty much for being alive. And fuck you Mr. and Mrs. Frankenfuck for damn near burning down a trail I have been running since I was 13. I hope you buy a scooter and never drive off road again. No human being with half a brain would have gone off trail, in those conditions, just to get around some passed-out dude in a Yota.
Well, we got about 3/4 of the way up one of those sections only to find bone stock Toyota resting its passenger front end on a very large boulder (boulder was wedged under the front bumper and against the A-arm and stub shaft). There was a frantic 20-something girl in the passenger seat, a passed-out cold piece of shit dude in driver's seat, broken glass all over the trail (driver's window that he had smashed out before passing out because he was too drunk to figure out how to open the door) and a 750 ml bottle of hennessey with only 1/4 left sitting on the ground.
Long story short, there was no way around them. I was able to yank the Yota off of the rock with some creative strap work. You can see the boulder next to the passenger door in the pic below. We disarmed (yes, he was literally in that condition and in possession of a firearm) the passed out fucktard and hid the keys.

The guy never woke up (yes, he was still alive, just passed out cold). I wasn't going to leave her up there, so she hopped in my Jeep and I drove her 40 minutes back down the hill, then came back up. By that time, the drunk fuck had woken up and was stumbling around in the trees, talking about how he got his friend's truck stuck. He had no clue that I had been there, didn't know the truck was no longer stuck, and didn't once ask where the girl was that had been with him.
He also didn't know that some POS driving a frankenfuck of a 60's vehicle mated to a truck frame with about 14" of leaf spring lift had tried to drive around him...straight over the top of deadfall, dried bushes, and trees. It was right about then that I yelled "fire". Frankenfuck's exhaust caught the brush on fire...not just a little fire, but the kind that destroyed the vehicle in about five minutes (melted tires and all). Fortunately, I guess, Frankenfuck and Mrs. Frankenfuck made it out safely and were on the phone calling the fire department.
So much more to the story but it's better told over a beer than in written form. Needless to say though, people fucking suck.
Fuck you to the guy in the Toyota for driving drunk, plugging the trail, putting someone else's life in danger... and pretty much for being alive. And fuck you Mr. and Mrs. Frankenfuck for damn near burning down a trail I have been running since I was 13. I hope you buy a scooter and never drive off road again. No human being with half a brain would have gone off trail, in those conditions, just to get around some passed-out dude in a Yota.
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